Friday, August 6, 2010

The Sorrow and the Agony (of Morning Sickness)

The "get off me don't touch me" is totally ramping up. When my 2yo nurses he's all elbows and knees and shoulders, which before I used to just flex my muscles and take pride that I had my own personal gym machine, but now I just want to remove him from my surroundings! At night he nurses for five minutes (if I can stand it) and then it's tough love; I am so thankful that my two boys sleep together, I wouldn't be able to stand sleeping with them--if you can even call my restless insomnience sleep! LOL! It reminds me of fever sleep--never fully dissolved in the dream--waking, turning, lots of leg stretching, strange dreams, even talking in my sleep the other night--which I never do--and it scared my husband so much--who is already a worse sleeper than me even in this pregnant state--that he wanted to stay home from work (he's always thinking up excuses to stay home--every day he calls me and when I say I am a couch blob he says, "Do you want me to come home?" NOO!!! I'm pregnant, for godsakes, not dying!!)

If you are pregnant for the first time and you *feel* like you are dying or want to die or are severely depressed over your lack of ability to do anything or think a straight thought--congratulations! you are normal! When I went through this the first time my husband and I had only been together FIVE MONTHS (not yet married)! OMG, the fighting was incredible--he didn't understand what happened to me, I thought I had truly lost my marbles--why *couldn't* I do ANYTHING for weeks on end?? My husband had never seen anything like it and thought I was exaggerating! We had to go to counseling, but the smell of her plug-in air freshener was so repulsive that I just created a whole emotional ball around what was wrong with *her!* and then around that time it started to let up and "aaaaaaaaaah" I could breathe again and just tried to forget about that horrible time!


lborganicdesigns said...

I just learned you're expecting #3...Warm congrats from an old friend! Looking forward to following you on this wonderful journey as we'd love to expand our family in the coming years as well - Can 3 really be that much harder than 2? That is the burning question. Sending you Love and A Cool Coastal Breeze from San Diego (Summer has not yet officially started here)...Linds

~JEN~ said...

i so wish I was there to get you through this!

morning sickness is the worst.....